Best of, #28. Coffee

After a long delay, I present #28. Coffee. This song is the (sort of) final track on Aesop’s fifth album titled ‘None Shall Pass’ released in the summer of ‘07 and features John Darnielle from the Mountain Goats.

The fact that Aesop and Darnielle did a rap song together is in itself enough of a reason for Coffee to be notable, but the fact that it clicks is what puts it on my list. While their styles are completely different, maybe even polar opposites, it makes sense that these two artists can come together to make a song that works. Both are incredible lyricists with unique voices. I hope I’ve convinced you that Aesop knows how to write a line or two by now, but let me quickly talk about Darnielle. Darnielle has a nasal-heavy delivery that wavers between whispering and screaming. He pumps out some great lyrics that are sometimes blatant and don’t require much deciphering such as this from the Mountain Goats song titled The Fall of the High School Running Back:

“And it felt stupendous,
chrome spokes on your Japanese bike,
but selling acid was a bad idea,
and selling it to a cop was a worse one,
and new laws said that
17-year-olds could do federal time.
You were the first one,
so I sing this song for you,
William Standaforth Donahue,
your grandfather rode the boat ,
over from Ireland, but
you made a bad decision or two.”

Sometimes his lyrics can be a little more ambiguous like this line from his song titled “International Small Arms Traffic Blues”:

“Our love is like the border between Greece and Albania”

Not sure what it means but I love it. I’d say his lyrics in Coffee are more like the latter. But let’s talk about Coffee.

You get the feeling that this song was inspired on a morning walk to get a cup of joe. Aes rises out of bed joyful with a day’s work ahead, because I can only imagine that’s how you feel when you get paid to make raps. He decides to get a little caffeine in his blood and strolls to the local coffee shop. Maybe he even brings along some pen and paper hoping a little inspiration is in store. It turns out there is inspiration everywhere, but that one kind of inspiration that blossoms from lack of faith in people. The kind where you’re so pissed off at the small, dumb things you can’t do anything but write about it. You leave the house with a smile, but soon you are drenched with sweat from the unbearable heat outside. You find yourself waiting behind a couple who just spent a small fortune on select name brand clothes for their young kids who don’t even know what they’re wearing. You finally order your coffee, but the barista with the outline of Africa tattooed on his forearm lets out a hoarse cough on it as he hands it to you as he mutters something about peace. You sit down and take a quick peep at the newspaper and notice a small segment by some half-brained critic bashing your latest work. We’ve all had a string of (at least some of) these moments. And it was those moments that lead to this song.

Here are some of the lyrics where Aes puts it way better than I ever could:

We just want our hermitry to stay and our coffee to go

Yeah…maybe I’ll take that coffee to go, Mr. Grass-Fed-Typerwriter-Fedora.

Face in the mud where the moxie melt, till he woke up drowning in Tchotchke hell.

Moxie, noun: the ability to be active. Tchotchke, noun: a small object that is decorative rather than strictly functional; a trinket.

On a brand new day, saw what he saw: property owners who crawl to the mall. With a bad toupee and a face like he altered the law, pace like he mourning a loss. Right hand on a can of worms, left full of gold he will trade for turf. I mean, that’s okay, you got to answer to you at the end of the volatile day. But a model of mercy and might? No way. Marionette who will clap and obey.

Unbelievable picture painted here. Aes shows us a rich man with bad hair mulling over some problem. Many people probably look towards this man with respect. Aes says nay, that dude is a puppet controlled by strings. The strings are probably controlled by his lust for money. Maybe. Who knows.

And a grown ass man shall abide as he wish

Pay no mind to the new recruit with the Play-Doh spine. Let’s be friends from opposite ends. Wave to the kid, don’t hop on the fence

Boom town kid who was taught by the binge that a man who expire with the most shit wins. That’s warpy American nonsense penned by the rich, not a routine friend in a pinch

Buy what you need, folks.

But just 'cause I don’t want to war with you don’t mean go warm up the barbecue

You have an awful opinion. I’m not going to tell you that though, because I’m not a dick. Wait, now you’re showing me pictures of your kids? Do I have to be a dick?

My high noon is a quick little minute, I don’t wanna spend it sitting with a critic, who simply isn’t going to ever really get it

Holy fuck. I didn’t realize how many great lines were in this song. Maybe it should have been higher on the list. I’ll close with one of my all time favorite Aes lines, a nod to his buddy Blockhead and to the Muppets:

Call for the monster beats and Blockhead got animal drums, like he’s Doctor Teeth. It goes red light, green light, one, two, three. One large coffee, fuck you, peace.

What a way to end his verse. Remember folks, take no prisoners. Keep an eye out for #27. I’ll give you a hint…it is from his latest album. Fuck you, peace!